as reported posted else where

[gamma a.i.]

life in the fulvia / gamma lane

Laz Nite me & 3 lovely Dancers attended/participated in a Sport-Dance Event 90 miles away .

I; the designated-driver, pre-warned all in advance that "cost to ride in a 36 year old GT was "a song": 1 song PER person, full rendition; language regardless.
& PUSH THE CAR IF IT QUIT SINGING!!

Dancer1 asked - while climbin in back seat was: "don't any of ur cars have 4 drs; besides ur 'lil Punto - that I'm afraid to ride in (this from driver of 20yr old Reno Twingo!) & I really hate ur lil 2door with pop-open back windows that mess up my flying hair. I'm afraid of ur Fiat cause it is so small & shifts by itself; I'll walk b4 I get in a Fulvia again...unless it s raining! Besides that, I don't like sitting on floor lookin at a dash-board & seeing nothin out the windshield!; like I am now"

Dancers2 & 3 shouted; "HA; we like that real low-car, its slow when J drives it- but makes us fell like we are goin fast, 2mm off autobahn pavement; but not so much fun for the 1 sittin sideways in rear; so be hapy that J took a biger car tonight"

We all lafed; as D2 axed a ? that I knew would come: "how come D1 got to ride in ur Fulvia w/out ME" ? I had a truthful-reply prepared & was not hit- by anyone!

D3 axed - after gracefuly-slinkin over 'fold-forward rt front seat": can U see anythin?; I can't since Im sittin so low in the back too & cause it is rainin C&D's & maybe cause Im shorter than any1 else in this car"
D2, who sat in front said; "what a nice smell; what is it? I replied - "leather-food, covered by over-sized white towels so no 1's Jeans get Creamy" (ha ha).
D2 also asked "wheres the CD player?; every car has 1, don't they? ...I've never owned a car...so I really don't know? I brought a CD of Austrian Cowgirls Yodeling American Country Songs; for "my song" will yodel & sing with them.

My replies were; "yes, I can see the highway when we reach it, but not well - cause old Lancia headlights are not very bright; but I know the road we are takin-so don't worry; windshield wipers & heater work fine & yes,no - my other cars (exept Fiat*) all have 2 drs; this GT has no CD player, nor airbags, abs, central lock but there are 4 seatbelts, 2 very slow working electric windows that appreciate a little assistance in getting up & sometimes slip down 1 notch during flight & a Poltraone Frau -exclusive to this car -leather interior. I didn't mention: flat 4 alu-engine; great brakes, fantastic handling; built by Pf etc...not wanting to put them to sleep.

D2 yodeled & sang in a strange Austrian Dialect of English (or Chinese?) for us; 3 songs...we had tears in our eyes....it was beautiful. BTW: she is not Austrian; but still did an AT dialect quite well.

D3 asked for my assistance to sing "Puff the Magic-Dragon", which # sang as well (# 1 never heard it b4!); we 3 then did a rockin-version of "Like a Rolling Stone" (never heard previously by #1) ; # 1 did however join us for a twangy "Knocking on Heavens Door"..as Gamma km flew by.

I asked: hows the ride? To hoots that it was my turn to sing, solo. I shocked every1 by singin a 5min song in 1min (Adventures of Isabel) & then again at original speed.....they made me sing 'slow version' 3x, which -by 3d repeat I could no longer do-I was choking back laffter. I was prodded into singin "Somethin Country, Somethin American...besides "Country Roads"; so I became (for 10 min) "Roger McGuinn"; 2 of 3 Ladies joined in on "The Times They are a Changing" Byrds-Version; which was repeated in the "PPM Version" by 4 singers; I am not sure if I was Peter or Paul or just a croaking-frog.

A gamma 4 potter whistled (as Gamma motors do) along - as wind hissed thru crack in left window;

# 1 tried to weasel out of singin solo; which was not goin to be tolerated by the rest 3
#1 sang Boney M versions of Christmas-Songs - that we've been practicin (the dances there of) for weeks; so we joined in & were happy

We arrived, we danced, we didn't win prizes, we sang for other Dancers (we had had lots of practice) Christmas Songs in 4 different languages (at 1 time) - with lotsa help from our dance-friends.

I didn't sing Isabel 1min version nor 5 min version (phew!); everybody sang (a great Americn Country Dance Song) - "Mustang Sally" while dancin...the Country-Band knew it well ! I (of course) sang 'Gamma Johnny' but no noticed!
We drank alcohol-free Gluewein til 04:00 & then went to an all-night China-Restaurant, where our friends - the owners - asked us "4" to dance & sing for them too; which we did. We didn't pay to eat !!

Yes, its tuff being a gamma Driver, xspecially when returin home - wif me singin "new-songs" in the rain, no one complaining about 2 doors, me yowlng a poor job of "a non-Yodel Version of Band's "The Weight" & then tiredly xplainin its perhaps meanins whatever maybe text (& xplainin who the Band "was", in short words); followed by Band's "Drove Ole Dixie-Down (sung in English only by me !); in3 other languages by 3 other singers - with total 4 totally different texts too.

Tomoro, our designated driver will spiff us 4 all to a rehearsal-hall in a Benz A Class w/ 4 doors & CD player - unless eveyone votes Gamma in the Rain again.